Friday, March 13, 2009

Job, part 18

Employment, self.

With all the unsettledness and turmoil around, with all the ambiguity of my new role, with the unclarity and lack of clear direction on what I am expected to do, it has become difficult at times to focus on daily tasks. With no clear responsibility for product release, many times I am just puzzled what to do next, and I end up sometimes doing very little.

This situation is extremely draining and demoralizing. (Sometimes I wonder if that's the plan; namely to whittle some of us down.)

I have come to listing daily what I do work on in a notebook. While normally I keep a notebook at work as a place-keeper for facts I would need to remember: decisions we are told about, telephone numbers, part numbers, dates for expected events, etc., in recent months it has become more about listing the tasks I do everyday, as a reminder in the potential situation I am asked what I did recently. Sad, isn't it.

So, in all, there have been times at the end of the day, when I wonder what I did accomplish that day. I knew I was being and doing, but what was accomplished?

Thinking this thorough, since I find myself in this situation, also known as 'circling the drain', I realize I must change something if I want different results.

So I came to realize I need to find things I want to accomplish, and list them, and then start accomplishing them. What better way to feel like I am accomplishing something useful every day than if I accomplish something everyday I determined was useful. And list those things in a notebook as I work on them and as I complete them.

Since I am still employed, what better way items to include on that list but skills that I would want to have should I need to look for work.

So I have begun to rescue myself.

(Continued.)